I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Randomize
