dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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