In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
