He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize