super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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