Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize