I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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