i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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