i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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