I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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