she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
