did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
