We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
