i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i just google imaged poop.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
