hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
