what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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