I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
