you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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