Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize