Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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