He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
