the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize