Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize