he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
