i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
