i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
