nut hugger
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
