4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
