it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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