Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
