Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
