so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
