Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
