why didn't you poke me back
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
