That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
