is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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