I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
