He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Hippo gnu deer
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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