im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
