Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
