Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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