it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
