I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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