I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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