Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
