I faked an abortion last night.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
he told me I talked like a deaf person
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
