I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
