They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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