Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
