I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
